...everything is over between us!
I am a respectable, staid man, in service to a nobleman!
I have no need of a frivolous woman!
Remy, my dearest!
You caught this disease from monsieur Monsoreau, right? He thinks a mosquito on madame Diana is a rival!
-And you are the same! -Wait, Gertrude, wait! I must go to monsieur de Monsoreau.
And you must send a messenger to Angers.
Madame Diana sends the following message to my master...
"We will be leaving in the morning!"
Understood? Adieu! -Adieu? Remy, what about me?
We will talk tomorrow about this.
-Is everything ready? -Yes, count, the horses are saddled!
-Was there a messenger? -Yes, from Meridor, they will depart in the morning.
Then we will depart at once.
-Bring the horses to me. -Yes, monsieur le Comte!
Be careful, you idiots! It hurts!
Monsieur le Comte!
-What news? -They are on their way!
I hear them.
Bring the horses here.
Are you not feeling worse, count?
I manage. Well enough...
Based on a novel by Alexandre Dumas (père)
La Dame de Monsoreau
Episode 19
Faster! Why are you so slow? Whip the horses!
Faster is not possible - this accursed road!
All these humps and bumps... Go! Speed up, you beasts!
Halt! The wheel..!
What`s the matter?!
Monsieur le Comte ordered not to stop during the journey!
The damned wheel nearly fell off!
-Orville! -Here!
It appears they intend to spend the night on the road.
What a grand idea of monsieur de Monsoreau`s!
I could not have thought of anything better myself!
-Bring the horses! -Yes!
Madame...
Madame! Where are you?
I am here.
Then all is well.
It is him! He is waiting - slow down, he will join you!
Be careful!
What was it? Who spoke to you, my lady?
-To me? -Yes.
No one, monsieur.
What do you mean, no one? I heard a voice myself!
And glimpsed a shadow near you!
A shadow? It must have been monsieur Remy.
Are you jealous of monsieur Remy as well?
No! But I would like for everyone to speak loudly, it entertains me.
There are certain matters, however, that better not be discussed in your presence, count!
Why is that?
Firstly, something of no interest to you might be discussed...
And secondly something all too interesting for you!
What did monsieur Remy tell you?
What I told madame, count, is that if you get this exited over every trifle, you would die before we reach Paris!
Stop the carriage!
Monsieur de Monsoreau, I expect you to be most docile...
...or I cannot guarantee that the bleeding will not restart!
Well well, now let me measure your pulse.
Orville! Wait for me here.
What I can guarantee is that you have fever now.
Stay put and rest!
Move!
Where is madame Diana?
Madame Diana!
Respond at once!
Countess... Madame! Where are you?
Him again.
-It is a great sin, but I truly hate him sometimes. -Listen!
Listen, Diana, we are alone now - let us flee!
Let us escape, what could prevent us? Just say the word, a single word -
Look at the fields in front of us, happiness, freedom, and no one to take you away from me!
-So..? Just one word, Diana! -No, I cannot.
-If we flee this would dishonour my father`s name! -If he knew of our love, he would understand!
To my father, nothing matters more than duty!
The scandal and the shame would kill him.
So... we must part ways again.
I will never go against your will.
Countess!!! Countess, reply!
Or... I will rise and come after you even if it costs me my life!
Halt. Stop!
He will do it.
He will kill himself!
What is the matter, monsieur?
I am here.
Where have you been, madame?
Where else, monsieur, but right behind your carriage!
Ride beside it! Beside me!
Beside me!
Do not leave me.
Paris
-What happened?! -The count is severely injured.
We must carry him inside... Prepare a room and a bed!
Louvre
Good dog! Very good...
With each passing day, Henri, the list of your enemies grows longer and longer...
The reason is their numbers - increasing every day as well!
Fetch!
All... all betray me!
Let us list them all then - letter "A"?
"Anjou", the new candidate for the throne!
Listed under "B" - "Bussy", his friend and advisor.
Listed under "G" - the Guises!
That flock of vultures.
Tell me, Your Majesty, whom did you list under "L"?
St. Luc, of course!
But Your Majesty, if I may... We already listed him under "S".
I will list this worthless traitor... under every letter that can be found in his vile name!
The way I see it, this is too great an honour...
...for this good-for-nothing, whose only crime consists of having eloped with his own wife!
This is where you are wrong!
I consider his crime a crime against the state!
He fled to Anjou after all, where my brother is hiding as well.
Do you truly not understand that the wife is merely a front?
He is preparing a revolt - together with my traitor of a brother!
I might be wrong, but I suppose there are more important matters one could attend to in the morning!
-I must leave you for a moment... -Just go!
In the meantime, you may coo at each other, turtledoves!
Sire, I have begun to feel some gratitude towards your brother, the duke of Anjou...
Would you care to elaborate, madame?
The duke is orchestrating a revolt... And I noticed that, in moments of danger...
...you always seem to feel a particular need for my company.
Your Majesty, monsieur de St. Luc!
Monsieur de St. Luc?
Where?! In Paris?
In the Louvre!
Madame.
Pray forgive me - these are vital matters of the state.
-They are of little import to women. -Certainly, vital matters of the state!
I just beg you, Sire, do not be angry...
Where is he?
In the throne room.
Come.
I must dress.
I wonder... I wonder why this scoundrel decided to appear here!
Let us wait and see!
He must have come as an ambassador of the rebellious Anjou!
As my brother`s representative.
This blackguard will shield himself with the revolt as if it was a charter of immunity!
Let us wait and see!
Or could it be that he is here to demand that I return the rights to his lands?
-Wait and see! -What is it with your annoying repetitions?!
This constant "Wait and see!" - like a parrot!
Do you truly think I am entertained answering your endless stream of questions?
When the king asks you, you must answer at least something other than "Wait and see!"
Do you really want me to give you a proper answer?
Your foolish assumptions are about to drive me out of my wits!
Monsieur Chicot!
What, monsieur Henri?
Chicot, my friend...
Why are you being so rude to me when I suffer so?
Henri, my son, do not suffer!
Everyone betrays me.
You truly think so?
Wait and see!
His Majesty the king of France, Henri III Valois!
And yet you are here, monsieur!
Truth be told, your arrival in the Louvre astonishes me.
Sire, as for me...
...I am rather astonished that you have not been expecting me in these circumstances!
What do you mean by that, monsieur?
Sire, you are in danger!
Yes, Your Majesty, a danger most real and grave!
A danger, for which the king would need all those who are loyal to him.
As I am convinced that all help is needed here...
...I have come to offer my humble services to my king.
It appears I was right when I said "Wait and see!"
Monsieur...
You merely fulfilled your duty...
...as you are under an obligation to serve me.
All the king`s subjects must serve Your Majesty.
But in times such as these many forget their duty.
I came here to fulfill my duty and I am glad...
...that you still deign to consider me as one of your vassals.
Monsieur, if you returned for the reasons you have just mentioned...
...then you had not been sent here on a mission.
And you bear no charter of immunity, I assume?
Sire, I returned just to return!
You may throw me into the Bastille or have me executed, but my duty is done!
Sire, Anjou is on fire! Touraine is about to rise and Guyenne to extend a helping hand to it...
The duke of Anjou is orchestrating a revolt in the South and West of France.
And he gets a lot of support in his endeavors, does he not?
Sire, neither advice nor admonition have stopped the duke yet.
And monsieur de Bussy cannot relieve your brother of the fear you inspire - despite his persistence!
So, does this mean this rebel is quivering with fear?
What a clever fellow this St. Luc is!
I would like to shake his hand.
Welcome back, St. Luc!
Sire, I am overjoyed to have regained my beloved master!
But you have become so thin...
...that I would not have recognized you if I had seen you in passing.
Sire!
What a misfortune to be so disliked by Your Majesty!
Rise, madame.
Rise.
Please rest assured...
I love everything that bears the name of St. Luc!
Take heart, madame!
-I admire you, what a loyal wife! -Sire, is the pardon granted then?
The Abbey of St. Genevieve
Ever since you returned, you have been prone to melancholy, my son!
Yes.
You might be right.
What were you occupied with before the luncheon, my worthy brother?
-Who, I? -Yes, you.
You were occupied with something, were you not?
Of course!
I was writing... a sermon!
A sermon to equal the one which you revealed so bravely during the Night of the Holy League?
Something like it!
How did it go..?
I regret very much not writing it down that night.
Dear brother, as if a man like you would ever have need of writing anything down!
You speak when inspired from above!
Your mouth opens, and as the words of our Lord are contained therein...
...your lips speak nothing but the Lord`s words!
-Such a curious matter, really! -My brother, you work too hard!
This is the cause - this is why your heart has grown so sorrowful, is it not?
Such is my nature...
By the way, is it possible that our repasts are too heavy for you?
I don`t know...
Perhaps you would like us to exchange our current Brother Cook for another?
Not all his dishes are a perfect success!
Decide on your own, I don`t know.
I get tired a lot.
A lot!
Forgive me, reverend father...
I suspect it might be the protracted stay in the monastery which weighs upon our venerable Father Gorenflot.
Yes, it weighs upon me most gravely!
It weighs upon me for certain!
Well, not as much weighs upon as...
I feel that I was born for a different life!
I was born for a life of struggle...
For political addresses on city squares...
For sermons on the street!
This is my true calling!
You are being consumed... by holy fire!
It prevents you from enjoying peaceful life in the monastery.
Your soul thirsts for more.
No one has the right to refuse you your calling - go on and fulfill your mission!
-Fight for the Christ! -I will, I will!
-But take care to preserve your precious life! -Of course, that I will do for certain!
-And do return on the Great Day! -I will, I will return! Which day do you mean?
-The feast of Corpus Christi! -Certainly, I will come back for the feast!
I will run back for the feast!
You will be entrusted with a special mission on that day.
I know that!
You have prepared the sermon, haven`t you?
-The sermon? -Yes!
Ah, the sermon is ready, most assuredly ready!
Read it to me!
You?
Only to you alone.
I am listening.
A sermon...
The sermon!
"The chain that thrashes the grain thrashes itself..."
I will go then!
"Thrashes itself..." - such wisdom!
Here you go.
It was wonderful. Genius!
What an exceptional being!
His lips speak like those of Saint John...
...and consume food like those of Gargantua!
So it is confirmed, I may leave?
Wait, wait, my son!
Oh... Oh! Reverend fa... My Panurge!
Panurge, my friend!
I thought I would never see you again!
Reverend father, I will be on my way then!
-Yes, my son, go! -I am going.
No one has the right to suppress their calling!
-And your calling is fighting for the Christ! -Of course...
Go. And follow the steps our Lord sets!
Reverend father... Which steps do I follow?
-The steps our Lord sets. -Ah, I knew that!
Reverend father, could you give me some money?
-To draw some inspiration... -Of course, here you go.
...when dispensing alms!
As any good Christian should do.
And now... away we go!
Yes.
Yes, my son.
The road awaits!
The road awaits, Panurge!
Move, friend, move!
Reverend father, I will be of such use to our monastery!
Come, Panurge, we are almost there! Move, my friend!
I will feed you and drink a few drops myself - here we are!
-Who is there?! -A friend!
What do you want of me?
Would you kindly show me the way to the "Horn of Plenty"?
Gladly! Here it is!
This cannot be!
Chicot! Good day, Chicot! -And to you!
I was on my way to your monastery for a visit, but saw you leave and was following for a while...
...and as soon as I saw you head in the only correct direction, here I am!
Friend, so glad to see you!
I swear by the Virgin, you have grown thinner!
And you`ve gained some weight, if I am honest!
I suspect we both attempt to flatter each other!
Fair enough, I suggest we continue with the compliments over a glass of wine.
"King Edward departed in 1471..."
"...the same year when the duke of Burgundy marched with an army against the king."
"And the duke was certain that his exploits in England could not end in a failure..."
Forgive me. Monsieur le Comte, it is time for your medicine.
How do you feel?
Thanks to your care... I feel that my strength is returning to me.
You should lie down.
No. I can breathe more easily this way.
The pain of the wound lessens as well while sitting.
As you wish.
Monsieur le Comte... Would you mind me leaving you for a short while?
I have a strong wish to see my master, Comte de Bussy.
-I found out he arrived in Paris today. -So monsieur de Bussy is in Paris now?
Yes. He will report to the king in his capacity as the ambassador of the duke of Anjou.
Please tell monsieur de Bussy he should exercise caution.
He might pay too high a price for his nobility and his loyalty.
Please also forward my regards and tell him I would be glad to welcome him in my home.
I will forward your words in every detail!
Maitre Remy, before you leave, please visit Gertrude - she has a small errand for you.
"As soon as king Edward reached dry land, he marched directly to London..."
Here is madame Diana`s letter for monsieur de Bussy.
What is it, Gertrude? Are you angry with me?
And he even dares to ask!
You... insufferable man!
The moment everything started going well with our masters, you changed for good!
As if someone put a bad spell on us!
What did I do to displease you?
I have been crying rivers for as long as you have been so cold with me!
I have even been crying when cooking for the masters. No need for salt anymore with my tears!
This might even be the reason for our Monsoreau`s fast recovery!
You know, Gertrude, I read in the books of the ancients that tears possess exceptional healing properties.
Most of all those of females! Gertrude, I do love you.
I do love you... But right at this moment I must bring this letter to my master!
Where are you going?! Remy! I will not be so forgiving next time!
Your health, monsieur Chicot!
-My lovely, here you are! -Bonjour!
Bonjour, Mariquita - what a beauty you are after all!
-Mariquita, sit with us! -No no no, I cannot!
Maitre Bonhomet is waiting for me!
-Sit, sit with us! -Hold this!
-No, I really must go! No, not so much! -Just a sip!
-To us! -Yes, precisely!
-Fine, just a sip then! -Your health! -To Mariquita!
To Mariquita!
Mariquita, Mariquita, let us sing a song!
Sing my favourite one, yes? For the soul... How did it go?
Wait, I remember...
-About that passionate love affair... -No, you have it all wrong - it goes like this!
Love beguiles me with delights for my song to rise in flight...
All my worries, all my troubles I will chase away, my friends!
May my enemies defame me, this will only spur me on - always happy, always merry!
Mariquita!
-Mariquita! -Maitre Bonhomet is waiting!
-Mariquita, don`t leave us! -No, no, this time I really must!
-I can`t stay! -Will you come back? -Yes, I will!
By the way, it has been a while since I last saw monks from the Abbey of St. Genevieve on our streets.
Rumor has it you are no longer allowed to leave the monastery...
How did you manage to slip from their grasp, friend?
Here is how:
Brother gate-keeper opened the monastery gate for me himself!
The prior blessed me...
And forbade everyone to hinder me from following my true calling!
I would be interested to know which.
Calling? Er... Preaching on squares to promote the true faith!
And... er, what else was there? Wait.
Ah, I remember - and to fight among the warriors of Christ!
I am allowed to stay away from the monastery until the Feast of Corpus Christi!
And what will happen on the day of Corpus Christi?
What, you ask?
I will return to the monastery to perform a special mission...
Which mission?
Who knows? I don`t for sure!
But you, as a sensible man, must find out all you can about your mission!
You must carefully prepare for it in advance!
Yes, you are right, monsieur Chicot!
I think... I suspect they want me to make a speech again!
Well well! That task is child`s play for you!
The king still turns slightly green when he remembers what you told him on the day of the League!
Forgive me, monsieur Chicot, forgive me! I was a bit carried away by enthusiasm that time...
But... it was not my fault.
It was the Voice of our Lord speaking in me...
Or so the prior told me.
Sometimes one has trouble finding words for a sermon...
But It... The Voice of our Lord in me, I mean... Remains silent.
-Monsieur Chicot! -What is it?
You have not been listening at all...
I am listening, friend. I am listening..
I disagree, this cannot be!
The duke of Anjou would not...
-Messieurs, Crillon is here! -Monsieur de Crillon!
-Tell us who the ambassador is! -Messieurs...
I may only tell you one thing - the ambassador of the rebel prince... is already in Paris!
Maugiron, you are not quite up to the mark today!
It only seems so, Schomberg!
You must have spent an eventful night!
Quite! Quite eventful!
-Take this! -Very clumsy, Maugiron!
Messieurs, I have incredible news!
The duke of Anjou sent an ambassador to our king!
What?! But this cannot be!
Alas, but it is so!
Oh Lord... An ambassador?!
Yes.
Whether you believe it or not!
-The king`s rage was a thing to behold! -The nerve!
But who is he, that ambassador?
No one knows as of yet... But I swear on my honour, I would not like to be in his shoes!
I promise, should that ambassador be old, we will make a laughing stock of him...
...and send him to the Bastille!
But should he be young instead, we will cut him in pieces...
...and send a piece to each of the French provinces to better illustrate the king`s displeasure!
What do you think of this, Quelus?
This individual is either recklessly brave...
...or exceptionally stupid!
Have you heard?
Eh?
Of course.
Then what do you think of this?
I think that... your brother intends to dethrone you...
...make a monk of you...
...or poison you - common practice with your dynasty.
He intends to do to you what you did to your elder brother.
Exactly what your mother taught all of you to do to each other!
Leave our family traditions out of it, Chicot!
You know exactly what I am talking about - namely the ambassador from Angers!
Sire...
I assume that the duke of Anjou either sent an ambassador to you...
...or he did not!
Hardly worthy of such profound contemplation, your lovely dilemma!
Patience, my son!
As your royal mother - may the Lord preserve her! - tends to say.
By all devils, I have an angel`s patience if I am still listening to you!
You do have good taste! May I continue?
You may.
Then listen.
If he sent an ambassador to you... this means he assumes he can do so freely.
And if he assumes this - and he is caution personified! - it can only mean he considers himself strong.
If he is strong, we would be well advised to be wary of him.
Let us respect the strong!
We may deceive them, but we should not play with them...
We will receive the ambassador and reassure him that we could not be happier doing so.
This does not put any obligation on us.
And does not benefit us either.
But it does!
Later, we will find a way to punish - not the poor herald, merely a messenger or a servant -
...but instead, we will seize his master - the great and illustrious duke of Anjou!
The one and only - and the true instigator of the revolt.
We will imprison him in a fortress far more secure than the Louvre...
Together with the unholy trinity of the Guises, of course!
Oh Sire, let us do this!
And if he does not send that ambassador after all?
-Well... -What do we do in this case?
If he does not send an ambassador to you...
...at least prevent your friends from bleating!
Bleating?!
What do you mean?
You understood me perfectly.
I would have said "roaring", if there had been any way to compare them to lions.
Listen, Henri...
It is nauseating to watch those young fellows, bearded like monkeys from your menagerie...
...play a childish game of ghosts and try to scare people with the cries of "Boo!"
And if the duke did not send anyone, they will assume it was for fear of them!
Your advice then?
My king, I recommend you to wait.
This encompasses one half of Solomon`s wisdom.
If the ambassador arrives... make a pleasant face.
If no one arrives, do whatever you wish...
But trust me, you should not make of your brother a sacrifice to those idlers!
Why the hell would you even?!
I admit, he is a great scoundrel... But he is a Valois as well!
Kill him if you must!
But, if you value family honour, no disgrace -
- he succeeds in disgracing himself well enough on his own!
You are right, Chicot.
And here is another lesson you owe me.
Praise the Lord no one is counting them!
Monsieur le Comte...
Monsieur le Comte...
Damn it!
Where have you been, Remy?
I wanted to be in the Louvre before sunrise.
You have no reason to be angry, count, I run every errand of yours as instructed!
I treat the husband and bring the wife`s love letters to you...
Aesculapius and Mercury in one!
-May I ask you something, count? -Ask away.
If you intend to go to the Louvre, why are you dressed as if for an inn?
The ambassador of a rebellious prince will have ridden his horse to the point of exhaustion and...
...after it collapses at the gate of the Louvre, he must go to the king, carrying the dust of Angers on his boots!
I wonder what pleasure you derive from taunting them so!
I just do.
And now, Henri, please allow me to go to bed.
I had to make a monk drunk today...
And every time I embark on such a task, I remain drunk for a week afterwards.
What? A monk?
Do you mean that worthy brother from the monastery of St. Genevieve, by any chance?
Yes, the very same.
-By the way, you promised him an abbey! -I did?!
Damn it, Henri, this is the least you can do for him... after what he did for you!
So he is still loyal to me?
He adores you!
By the way, my son... The Feast of Corpus Christi is almost upon us.
So what?
I hope you do intend to impress us with a lovely penitential procession?
Of course.
I am a Christian king, and as such supposed to lead my people by example when it comes to piety.
Will you visit the four main monasteries in Paris, as is your habit on that day?
Yes, same as always.
Will the Abbey of St. Genevieve be one of them?
It will be the last one.
Very well.
Since when have you been interested in religious matters?
I am curious by nature!
And just now my curiosity has been satisfied.
Good night, Your Majesty!
Good night... Chicot.
Translated by Grafinyademonsoro on Tumblr
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